I Am Ashamed.

Yes.  I am.  I have yet to clean my room.  I really really need to though.  Noah gets the opportunity to run around, but there are so many things for him to chew (and we all know his struggle with chewing).  AND once I clean it- I can show you all the Happy Bunny Dance.  Also known as the Binky.  It cannot be explained, only shown.  So you have that to look forward to.

Speaking Of Dogs...

The title of the last post had the word dog in it, if you recall. Which reminded me. I have one of those!

That thing on the end of my bed is called Bandit.  That was his name when we adopted him from the SPCA 10 years ago.  He was sooo good that first week.  When we ate dinner, he went and relaxed in another room.  We couldn't figure out why they named him Bandit... until he started stealing our food.  He manipulated us.  During dinner he'd come up to one of us pretending to be all lovey, licking and such, and as soon as that person let their guard down he dove at the dinner plate.  He takes gum out of purses.  He steals beds.  His previous owners named him well.

He's an old man now, but still eats anything we turn our backs on for 2 seconds.  That dog has eaten pounds, literally, of chocolate.  And he had no complications.  Man, I didn't realize how old he looks until this picture... :(

Despite this apathetic nose-less face, I know he loves me.  I walked him (well more like he dragged me places and I picked up his poop), played with him, shared my bed with him, went to obedience classes with him (he was bffs with a monstrous canary bulldog but was sore afraid of the lhasa apso puppy), and refrained from killing him when he licked my birthday cake.

Here's to you, Bandit!  The cats get a lot of attention because they are "special" but you're still one hell of a dog.  And we all know that Charlotte wants to be you.  

"Away, thou issue of mangy dog!"

That up there ^^ is a Shakespearian quote.  Well, I should say Shakespearian insult.  From the play Timon of Athens.  So why the obscure Shakespearian insult?  I'm brushing up on my Shakespeare, of course, because God has blessed us with the greatest acting talent of our time!  Nay, the greatest Shakespearian acting talent EVER!

Behold, here she is lying dead in the middle of the road, having just been brutally tickled to death by the feather duster she is laying on...

*choir of angels*

It's beautiful.  Charlotte has found her calling!

Attempted Murder

For some reason, cats are fascinated by plastic bags.  They bat at them, hide in them... and even try to kill one another with them.

My mother had gotten me a whole bunch of JUMBO ziplock bags to carry clothes to and from college.  I used them.  One time, after I returned home and unpacked, I left one of those big bags on the floor- open.

Sookie decides it's a good idea to climb inside.  That's when Charlotte sees her moment of opportunity.  I saw a commotion out of the corner of my eye.  Charlotte had gone and sat on top of the bag, sealing it with Sookie trapped inside.  Since there was a lack of oxygen, Sookie was freaking out (which is actually a very bad idea).

I, of course, threw Charlotte across the room and rescued my favorite Sookie.  Charlotte knows I'm onto her now... Oh how exhausting.

I would have pictures but I wasn't concerned with that at the time and cats have a hard time reenacting things.  So deal.

Cheap Date

When I first brought home the kittens I thought they'd want all sorts of fancy toys.  So I bought them some.  They rejected my offerings.

For a pen.  So I won't buy them fancy toys, I'll buy them a pack of ball point pens and we'll all be happy.

Oh wait...

What's that?  Abstract art, you say?  No.  You're wrong.  That is the result of Sookie chewing a pen on my bed.  She ruined a perfectly good pair of sheets too.  Giving her a pen was not my finest moment.

I Think You Have A Problem...

"Noah, I think we need to have a serious talk.  Let's be honest here.   You have a chewing problem.  Your addiction has led to the destruction of so many things...  I want to help you overcome this!"

"Please don't turn your back on me!  I'm reaching out to you... I want to help!"

Oh Charlotte, can't you see he's still in the denial phase?

He completely severed a cell phone charger.  He's chewed almost every book I own.  My headband.  Me.  My chair...  It's gotten serious.

We Sleep Together

Sookie and I like to cuddle in bed. She often falls asleep, and sometimes I do too.

These are pretty self-explanatory.

Supermodel

I think Sookie's calling is to be a supermodel.  

DAMN GIRL.  She's working that camera, and she's good at posing with others.  Just... don't mind me.  I'm awkward.

There's so much emotion behind those eyes.

Also, while I type this, Sookie is laying on my tummy staring at herself and purring.  She's got the vain thing down.  I'm calling Ford tomorrow.

I Wish I Could Capture It

Sometimes I get really frustrated and angry.  Taking a semester off is a lot harder than I expected.  And that's when I pick up my Noah.  He likes when I put my head on his and scratch his back.  Or stroke between his eyes.  He chatters his little teeth, which is the equivalent to a cat purring, and when I'm especially upset he licks me.  It's so hard to get a picture of his little tongue, but I'll try!

In the meantime, here we are snuggling!

Oh we're just too much!

You Cannot Escape...

...The watchful eyes of Charlotte.

She is always peeking out from somewhere.  All stealth like.  And watching.  Just watching.  It freaks me out.

Chem Nerds Can Be Artsy Fartsy Too!

Some days of my life I fancy myself a photographer...

But then I take pictures like this:

So maybe not. A for effort?

OH WAIT!

I do have something cute with Noah! I made a video a little bit ago..

Basically, Noah and I are tight.  A normal bunny would think that, like, I was a predator and try to get away.  Not Noah.  He knows I kid when I threaten to eat him.

Don't judge the dirtiness. Boys live here.

My cats are far too good for a water bowl. They drink from the faucet.

^^ Look at that bitty tongue!

^^ So dainty.  She was sort of batting it into her mouth...

^^ I don't even know what to say about this.

^^ They don't like when I make the water go away.  Those eyes... They give me nightmares.

Oh, and hey- Noah better do something cute soon.  Or he's going to the hawks.  {OK, that's an empty threat}

FIERCE

I'm training my Sookie to be a killer!  So I can sleep safe at night, and she can lose weight. 

Then there's Charlotte.  Who wants no part of this.  She's of no use to me.

Yes I'm holding a feather.  What of it?

Coming To Bed, Baby?

This is what awaits me on my bed at night.

Ho.

At least she's a happy ho.

Noah the Pig

Noah is secretly a pig.  With red eyes.

He wants to eat his whole bag of yogurt treats at once.

Then he, like the pig he is, gets inside the bag and plucks out treats one by one.  Notice his greedy open mouth.

Someday all that junk food eating will catch up to him.. someday.

She's Special

Also, I just had to make a quick post.  Noah is currently running around my room, so my door is closed.  Charlotte loves Noah, and usually whines whenever I shut her out.  They're BFFs.

As I was writing the last post, I heard a very soft knock on my door.  I figured it was my brother because he's a person, and usually people knock.  So I responded, "WHAT?"

To my surprise, I was answered with a little "Merrr?"

My cat not only knocked, she answered me.  Charlotte PWNS!

Yeah, I can't believe that thing is capable of such skills either.

The Ultimate FU

Sometimes Sookie can be pretty rude.  For instance, she puts her paw over my mouth while I'm talking to her to get me to be quiet.  

So I bite her.

But one time she gave me the ultimate "f*** you".  Seriously.

Since the cats had to live in my room until they were friends with the dog, I kept a litter box by the window.  It stunk.  I was a busy high schooler, and I'll admit that sometimes I forgot to clean it out for a couple of days.  As a punishment, the cats would pee on things.  I hated it.  Don't worry, I thoroughly cleaned everything.

One night, I had a dream that I was dipping my leg in a cold lake.  But sometimes our dreams are not merely dreams.  I awoke to find Sookie straddling my leg.  Which was wet.  Because she f***ing peed on it.  I cursed her, moved my leg to a less damp spot, and fell back asleep.

I figured I had forgotten to clean their litter box.  When I woke up for school, I looked over to see Sookie peeing in the litter box.  Which meant she obviously had nothing against the litter box.  Just me.  Although I have no idea why.

And that is the ultimate f*** you.  Well f*** you too, Sookie.

The Story of Noah

Noah is the name of my bunny.  Technically, he's a rex rabbit.  I was lonely in college and I decided a bunny was the perfect solution.  Although I did look for an adoption agency to find a companion, there was nothing out in Lancaster.  So I went to the only pet store around that sold bunnies.  Lo and behold, there he was- all tiny and velvety.  There were four, but I felt an instant connection to him.  He's basically a rescue since the store forgot to charge me for him.  He was free.

Here we are on our first day together:

I loved to give him kisses:

And he liked to snuggle me back:

Over time we bonded and he grew:

And grew:

He has mastered the art of annoying me:

But I continue to adore him.  We really do get along swimmingly.  His face is priceless when I catch him being bad.  I just wish his urine didn't smell like ammonia.

The Story of Sookie & Charlotte

Once upon a time I decided I wanted a kitten.  For this kitten I was willing to overcome all obstacles, like unconvinced parents, a messy house, and an oaf of a dog.  I poured through the pages of petfinder.com hoping to stumble upon the perfect little angel.  But alas, no angel appeared to me.

It was by chance that I found the Kitty Cottage on the site.  They didn't even have pictures of kittens online, just a note saying they always have some available.  So I found out their hours and I along with my father and brother headed over there.  They charged us $20.00 just to play with the kittens and made us sanitize ourselves.  Cat fanatics aren't always normal..

I should have known there was something "special" about the kittens I saw.  They were playing a game where one would go into a fabric igloo and push her paws against the bottom of the sides so the other could pounce at them.  Odd.  They were also the only two left from their litter and had to go together (that should have been a flag).

Their  names were Jessica and Cinnamon.  Ugly.  We walked in, and the two would not stop purring.  "Jessica" was climbing all over us while "Cinnamon" walked around our legs and played with my brother's shoe laces.  They were playful and sweet.  We fell in love and arranged to pick them up in a couple of days.

Jessica was renamed Sookie, and Cinnamon became Charlotte.  Sookie was quite spastic on the ride home (whining and flailing her arm through the carrier).  This worried me.  At first neither took to the dog.  This, too, worried me.  So up they went to live in my room where Charlotte produced the foulest feces I have ever smelt and they got tangled in my decorative mosquito net.

That all was two and a half years ago.  My little ladies are, indeed, "special" but I love them for it.

And now, without further ado, I give you:

Baby Charlotte & Baby Sookie (see that?! I changed the order in which they were presented! And probably surprised you.)